I didn’t do it because I had the perfect body.
I did it because I didn’t.
I was just recovering from the birth of my second child, and needed to shake a bit of baby fat, in fact.
And, after 10 years of caring for my mom, who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, and becoming a mom myself, I needed to turn my attention back to taking care of myself a bit.
So when my girlfriend told me that she was entering the Mrs. Maryland pageant, instead of putting it off in hopes for a better time, or a better body, I decided to enter with her.
Life was short, I had realized as I cared for my ailing mother. Entering a pageant was on the bucket list I’d created for myself when she became ill.
In December 2007, when I officially decided to enter and prepare for the pageant, I had crossed off a few things on the list. I had run a marathon and earned a master’s degree.
Both were challenging. But neither involved a swimsuit competition.
I knew that this experience would push me further beyond my comfort zone than I ever had been.
So, I didn’t do it because I had the perfect body, or because I was dying to parade around on stage in a swimsuit.
I did it because I didn’t, and I wasn’t.
And because I wanted my daughter to see that when there are challenges, when you have to go outside your comfort zone, when you aren’t sure, that you can still take on anything you want, and succeed.
Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved watching the Miss America pageants on television, but it had never occurred to me that I could be in one.
Much less win one.
And while the crown is nice, I have been more struck by the process itself. Of learning about and testing my limits as I got back into shape and prepared for the various aspects of the pageant, including the interview.
It was through the interviews—which counted as half of our score—that I learned the amazing stories of my fellow contestants. About their careers as engineers, their PhDs, about their extensive community service.
About my fellow contestant who immigrated to this country 15 years ago, and has worked for seven days a week at her own business since then to create a future for her children. This year, her daughter graduated from the University of Maryland.
And every woman I met through the pageant had an inspiring story like this, of how she is impacting her family, her community and her own individual self-confidence.
And that is where the true beauty in the Mrs. Maryland pageant lies for me.
Because each of us was uncomfortable with the swimsuit competition and with being on stage, but we did it anyway. Because of our sense of what we had to offer, as women, beyond what we looked like, beyond what everyone might see on the outside every day.
And yes, I enjoy wearing the crown. It has great meaning and significance for me.
But what I most treasure about it is the opportunity I have while I have the honor of wearing it to serve as a role model for other girls and women.
And what I hope I am able to convey to each of them is a concept I heard in a Tiger Woods commercial, where his father says to him, "I promise you that you’ll never meet another person as mentally tough as you in your entire life.”
Because I believe that the strongest gift we can give to each other as women, and pass along to our daughters, is the idea that the greatest goal is mental strength, and that each of us possesses it. That if you can dream it, you can make it happen.
At 37, I never thought it possible that I would be wearing a crown that I didn’t buy for myself.
And having the honor of wearing this one reminds me every day that its beauty has far more to do with the pretty face it frames, and actually represents the whole of the mind, spirit and strength that it surrounds.
Siobhan Davenport is a member of The Women’s Foundation’s board of directors and is the reigning 2008 Mrs. Maryland. She will compete in the national Mrs. America pageant in September. Siobhan’s platform and philanthropic interests include support for Alzheimer’s treatment and research, and increasing awareness of and support for early child care and education. She is an investor in The Women’s Foundation’s Early Child Care and Education Collaborative.
